"And now I will show you the most excellent way"

So I've been reading the chapter for a week now and not until today did I actually read this verse ... the VERY first sentence! So many places we read in God's word how important love is and without it things will just not be right. So it's not like I don't know that I should be loving, first and foremost but when the chapter starts out this way, it makes me think a bit more. I am a perfectionist (this can be a great asset or a very bad asset) so therefore I want to do things BEST always! "Hearing" Paul say "the most excellent way" gets me thinking, "Why, if I am so much of a perfectionist and have such high expectations of my loved ones and how things should go in my home, at my job, my week, my life, etc., then why do I not have these same expectations and standards of myself?" I too, nag and judge and pick apart my husband AND my children and I have no idea why I do it and why I can't control it. I want them to control their emotions and words but I am not the role model that I should be. I know in my mind what I should expect of myself but my actions do not confirm those thoughts. I know I cannot be perfect but Paul's words remind me that I can do A LOT better!

The slightest of noises sometimes bug me when I am trying to read or sleep or just sit quietly so the thought of a "resounding gong" or "clanging cymbal" is unbearable to me. Sometimes my house is like that (okay with 4 boys it's like that a lot but not always in a bad way!) But in thinking of the chaotic times (not happy chaos), it is always because we are in a state of unlovingness. The characteristics that pop out are "patient," "rude," "easily angered," "protects." Initially I am thinking of how the boys treat one another and then I realize that they had to learn that somewhere ... Jimmy can be very sarcastic and funny but in the heat of the moment, it often comes out rude. The boys hear that and then they hear me become "easily angered." Unfortunately, the apologies between Jimmy and I, that they hear are few and thinking about this made me very sad. But it has made me think not that I want them to hear more apologies but I want them to hear less rudeness and anger. I am not a patient person with my family and it stinks because I can be SOOO patient with friends and co-workers and strangers. Again my "perfectionist" person comes out and I want it all to go as planned and you know with kids it can NEVER go as planned. Immediately I am back to the easily angered person and this time my kids are the brunt of it! At this point I am reminded of the verse I came across a few weeks ago - "do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up..." Eph. 4:29 and then I read "Love never fails." LOVE NEVER FAILS ... how can you go wrong, if you have love?!?! How can things get messed up, how can there be arguments, tears, broken toys, hurt feelings, etc., if we just remember to act in love? So this week, everytime something isn't going as planned, I'm late to get out the door, clothes are in the middle of the floor, I don't feel like I'm getting any help, the boys are fighting over a toy, someone isn't listening, or homework isn't done yet, I am going to recall "this is the most excellent way" and "love never fails" and I will TRY (high, but not unreachable, expectations) to respond in calm, patient LOVE and see "how that works out for me!"